Sunday, September 12, 2010
sometimes i really wonder if i'm in the right school.
would it have been better if i had just transferred?
i mean, i don't even know why i'm studying for A levels. don't see myself taking up any jobs that come with university education.
hah. i think if the me 4 years ago saw me typing this now, he'd probably think i'm nuts.
don't know why, but my perspective of the world changed a lot in the past few years. and i get this impression that rich people are generally screwed up. so i never ever want to become one of them. money never has been attractive to me anyway. unless it's for dance classes :D
and so that kinda affected my motivation to study hard. as in, why study so hard if your goal in life isn't to make money? isn't the point of studying just to make money in the future? i find it meaningless now, and i think the only thing that keeps me going is not wanting to let my parents down.
what i really want? just to do what i really want to do. something that will be actually meaningful to me. and i think i've found that here in jc: dance.
but the problem is, living in an asian society that is usually filled with pragmatism, that goal is really hard to reach. people would probably think you're crazy, especially for someone like me. "what? you got jc education and you want to become a dancer? siao ah". some people even think dancers do it for the attention. and i think that's the mindset my parents have. bleh.
it's something i can't explain, this passion i have for dance. i just can't seem to keep still now every time some awesome beat starts playing. and i know i will spend the rest of my life regretting if i happen to give up dance.
what to do what to do ):
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